I'm done with winter

Its not like we get a real winter anyway. What amounts to winter is miserable cold and rain, what kind of winter is that. Lets begin with miserable cold. Miserable because it cannot make up its mind on whether the temp will hover below freezing? Forcing my thin blood to wrap myself in long john's and play the layering game.

Long johns are the greatest of inventions with roots well back to the vikings and beyond. The problem with them, at least for this male, is they tug on my leg hairs. Can you say annoying, its like I am surrounded by 3 year olds who have just declared my leg hairs are worms and MUST BE REMOVED! But I digress, long johns are warm, and required for me when the temp drops below 40 Deg. The other problem with long john's is they work exponentially well at temperatures above 40 deg. So now we start the problem with the typical Florida Panhandle winter. Wake up, check outside to see if it is a cold day. You have to because the day could be as warm as 60 deg. or as cold as 20 deg....in the same week. So, check outside...cold? yes? Don long johns, itch all day because by noon you may also be surrounded in a thin layer of sweat if the temp rises above 40 deg because remember, long johns work exponentially better above 40 deg.

Ok, so you decided to risk wearing long johns even though the temperature is hovering around 35 deg...but its raining the slow drizzling rain of "I am not cold enough to make snow so this is what you get" kind of rain. So now you have to add the waterproof boots because if my feet get wet, no matter how well the day has gone, it just began to suck. I would be a proud supporter of waders if they could figure out how to make the damn shoe wearable. I mean it is rubber, and crocks are rubber, why cant waders fit like crocks....I digress again.

So now the fun begins, I am warm, and dry, and now have to leave the house. In two hours, after stepping in that deeper then expected puddle and spending the morning having the dry foot taunt the other, the sun comes out and it is 60 deg, humidity rises to 90% and the day turn gorgeous except you have one wet booted foot, your sweating your britches off in your long johns and you forgot your full backpack of clothing ranging from a pair of shorts to spare socks, crocks and t-shirt as well as another pair of long johns (in case the weather went the other way) and another jacket to add to the layering.

So have your self, a merry panhandle winter, where you cant tell if it is winter or just summer having a bad day.